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Drinking Games By Yahan Wu

     Drinking games: A unique social subculture, forging strange, unlikely friendships and memories, or the senseless slaughtering of brain cells?

     Either way, Taiwan is swarming with drinking-game enthusiasts, so I've put together a couple of pointers to help amateurs survive such matches.

Number one: If you know you'll be facing a barrage of expectant competitors, eat a generous meal half an hour before arriving. Something oily is good: The layer of oil protects your stomach lining and slows down the absorption of liquids, i.e. beer and whiskey. For the braver, try this: My 87-year-old grandfather, whom all acquaintances swear they've never seen drunk, recommends downing a shot of cooking oil before heading out.

    Number two: Don't let them smell fear. When sharks smell blood they go for the kill. Keep your cool even when losing, as becoming distraught and excited will only increase frazzled nerves. Easier said than done, I know, but try.

Number three: Don't underestimate good old natural water, and stretching your legs. Drink about one glass of water for every half glass of liquor. Water helps dilute alcohol concentration levels. Also, try to pace yourself: make excuses to take/make a call; go to the bathroom; offer to buy more food/drinks; or simply just perform a 10-minute vanishing act. Moving helps you sober up and avoid the battlefield.

    Final graceful exits to consider: a) play host and look after people/food/drinks--you'll look too busy to be entertained and have an honorable excuse for not participating; b) play drunk, having conceded defeat--this pleases some competitors; or c) tell them you're strictly religious--Muslim, Catholic, Hindu, whatever--and god will strike you BBQ-dead if you consume even a drop of alcohol. Use this excuse only in emergencies!